When Kanye was diagnosed with autism, I felt a bit lost. I cried. I wouldn’t say I was completely surprised, though—we had already noticed a few signs, and my husband had mentioned several times that he wanted to have Kanye evaluated by a neurodevelopmental pediatrician—a specialist who assesses children with delays or differences in behavior, development, or growth.
What Made Us Pause and Pay Closer Attention
Aside from being nonverbal at 2 years old, these were some of the signs that made us think he might have autism:
- He flaps his hands a lot when he’s excited.
- He tiptoes around the house.
- He lines up his toys but doesn’t really play with them in the usual way.
- He wouldn’t respond when we called him by his name.
- He didn’t respond to a “hi” or “hello.”
- He mostly used echolalia—repeating what he heard from TV shows instead of using his own words.
Basically, he could talk a lot, but not hold a meaningful conversation.
From Heartbreak to Hope: Our First Steps Toward Help
When the doctor told us, it really broke my heart. I couldn’t stop worrying. So many “what ifs” filled my mind. I was scared for his future. I knew autism is a lifelong condition and there’s no cure, so I kept thinking — what will happen to him when he grows up? What if my husband and I are no longer around? Who will take care of him? What if he gets bullied? The questions just wouldn’t stop.
If it were not because of my husband, I would not have calmed myself down. He was handling the situation so well, helping me cope with my anxiety. He encouraged me to have an open mind, and start looking for early interventions. He taught me to not dwell too much on my negative emotions, but instead, look for ways how we can provide help for Kanye the earliest. He did cry too, and seeing him cry breaks my heart. I suddenly felt wanting to be strong for him too.
Together we scouted therapy centers for Kanye, and even enrolled him in Preschool. Kanye has been undergoing occupational therapy twice a week for almost 3 years now, and he has shown so much progress.
Caring Through the Chaos
It was hard. Especially when he’s having meltdowns, I often get frustrated because I don’t know what he wants, and he can’t express what he needs.
It became really much harder when he started getting flu, or asthma. It was so much trouble making him take his medicine. You just can’t easily distract him like how you would do it to a non special needs child. You cannot expect him to understand your explanation as to why he needs to be nebulized, why he needs to be pricked by a needle for laboratory tests, and why he needs to have the kool fever on his forehead. All he did was resist, cry so hard, and kick me.
It Was Hard Until It Wasn’t
It was so hard—him being nonverbal—until suddenly, it wasn’t that hard anymore.
One Saturday, we were leaving for therapy. He was in the car, buckled up. As we were approaching the entrance, there was a big banner at the gate that said “Open House.” And you know who I heard reading what was on that banner? It was Kanye.
At first, I didn’t think much of it. Maybe it was just a coincidence. But when we got home after therapy, I immediately grabbed a notebook and pen. I wrote “OPEN HOUSE” in all caps and showed it to him.
I asked, “Can you read this?”
Then he said, “Open House.”
I wrote another phrase—and again, he read it right! I was so surprised and didn’t want that moment to end, so I kept going. I asked him to read many of the words I had written. He was amazing.
That was the day I discovered he already knew how to read. Not unfamiliar words, of course—only the ones he had already encountered.
Brilliant boy.
Little Phrases, Big Progress
So, I took advantage of it. Whenever he needed something, instead of taking my hand and leading me to it, I would write it down on a piece of paper—or on the LED board I bought online.
If he wanted to drink water, I’d write: “Please get me water, Mama.”
If he wanted his favorite snacks, he’d read: “Please get orange donut,” or “Please get strawberry yogurt.”
If he wanted his iPad, he’d read: “Please get my iPad.” And so on.
What amazed me even more was how he improvised. The wording, the intonation—it was beyond adorable. For example, when he wanted to use his iPad with the green casing, he would say:
“Please get green iPad, please Mama… please Mama.”
I wish I could include a recording of him saying that. The second “please Mama” had an intonation that sounded almost like he was begging—it melted my heart every time.
Wrapping it up
It may be hard at first, but with patience and perseverance, things do get easier. Kanye’s therapist once told me that if I want him to learn something, I just need to patiently teach and train him—repeat it as many times as needed—and he will learn. I held on to that. Our kids may have learning delays, but they can still learn. All we have to do is teach them.